There may not be too many jokes about cress at the moment, but this will hopefully improve over the next few months. Anyway, let the laughs role on!
Who in 1992 made you ‘jump, jump?’
Cress Kross
What sport takes you through a field of cress?
Cress Country
What is celebrated on the 25 December each year?
Cressmas
David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson star in…?
The Cress Files
Not Thorpe Park, but…
Cressington, World of Adventures
Which train station can you find cress in the morning at?
Mornington Cressent
Who was the alleged son of God?
Jesus Cress
What is a traditional Easter food?
Hot Cress Buns
What do you call a cruciferous plant at the bottom of a cliff?
Cressfallen
What train station is it best to buy cress at?
King’s Cress St Pancress
What Scottish lake is home to an allusive monster?
Loch Cress
Who did the ten disciples follow?
The Cressiah
What would you expect to find in Iraq?
Cress Missiles
Which sports TV presenter is fond of our cause?
Cress Lynam
What was Richard O’Brien most renowned for?
The Cresstal Maze
Who wrote Star Wars?
George Lucress
What do you have if you can't face an essential piece of salad garnish any more?
Manic decression
Game played on a three by three grid?
Noughts and Cresses
What do you call a transvestite cruciferous plant-fan who is bone idle?
A Cress Dosser
Recent Bond film (even if it is a lie)?
The Cress is Not Enough
Best known as Superman
Cresstopher Reeves
“A rolling stone gathers no cress”
“Let there be cress”
“We are all of us in the gutter, but some of us are looking for cress.”
“Cressta la vista, baby”
As you can tell, this page is still expanding, but if you have any ideas for cress related films, then why not email me, and I’ll put the best ones up.
Just to start everyone off:
The Texas Cressaw Massacre*
The Cress is not Enough
Octocressy
Cressfinger
White Cressmas
*don’t worry, cress can never harm.
The following people have contributed to this page, but for reasons of tact and neatness, their specific contributions will remain anonymous, but the following list is most assuredly definitive:
Colin Dickev
Gemma D.
D. Dobson